I know it sounds silly, but I always used to be a skinny mini. When I graduated high school, I was 104 pounds. However, when I was a freshman in high school I weighed 123 pounds for a while and I felt like a fat cow! I remember looking at pictures of myself and thinking, 'ugh I need to fix THAT!' Comments from other people around me didn't help either. So I started to push myself to lose weight at all costs. I hate to admit it, but I even made myself throw up several times and started to make myself not eat. I always looked forward to sports so I could get rid of my teenager fat and work towards a leaner body. Isn't it scary to think what just a few "Hey fattie" or "that shirt makes you look fat" comments can do to you? I kept up that attitude through out most of high school. My senior year, I took 2 gym classes in one quarter during track season, which is how I became 104 pounds.
After high school, I gained some weight (which was a good thing because I looked too skinny for a while) and ended up being around 115-118 pounds most of the time. I stopped puking up my food and making myself not eat and I choose several jobs that kept me moving around to make sure I stayed skinny and fit. On top of that, I would walk just about everywhere and go for the occasional run. My goal for my life at that point was to stay thin!
Little did I know everything would soon change...
In December of 2009, I got pregnant with Corvin. At the end of my pregnancy with him I was 154 pounds. He came out, and I got back down to 130ish. Then I got pregnant with Zander. At the end of my pregnancy with him I was a whopping 172 pounds. Yikes :/
When I saw that number on the scale, I was embarrassed! Kind of silly for a pregnant woman to be embarrassed about her weight, but I was. My fear of being fat came true and it sank into my head and crushed every last bit of confidence I had left. I didn't want to look at myself in the mirror, I photoshoped pictures of myself a little before posting them online or I at least cropped them, and I didn't want Allyn to touch my belly (still don't actually). It was hard, and still is hard, for me to deal with.
As of right now, I have more of a sense of accomplishment. I can proudly say I've lost 42 pounds, the healthy way, since October 29th 2011. Soon, I will be able to proudly say I'm 129 pounds. Seeing a '2' as the second number in my weight makes me feel like a giant burden has been lifted off my shoulders. In another week, I'm sure I'll see that 2 on the scale. I cannot wait.
Once, I was severely close to being underweight.
Not more than 3 years later, I was overweight.
Now....I'm finally back to normal.
It's been a hell of a roller coaster ride, but in the end it was all worth it. I have an amazing family to show for all my weight gain, and I'll be a stronger person for losing all that weight in the end.
118, here I come :)
Until tomorrow :)
♥Taber
This is an unedited picture I took with my point and shoot. Love these little guys much :)
that is awesome, congrats lady!
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